Random Post

I made a post saying that I'm not going to write anything other than videogames, technology, music and scifi. I guess I can tie these topics to what I want to write.

I met one of the older people who live here, in these sets of apartments. It's pretty a pretty nice guy, but there are people who are old school and there are people who are old school. I believe he's the latter. My mom believes that it's fine to be someone's friend just to be their friend. I don't see it that way. I believe that friendships are like dating. To be someone's friend, that person has to share the same tolerance of others that I share.

I remember the guy saying "you seem to cut alot of friends", and I was like "well yeah. I am easily annoyed by others." The conversation got weirder when he asked me questions like "have you ever dated a black guy?" "Do you like black people?" and when I told him one of my friends is Latino, he described him as "Mexican" when he's not. I corrected him on that and he was nice and cordial, but seemed a bit defensive.

This man is a really nice man who is willing to show me how to use imaging programs, but I don't know if I can be friends with anyone who has an old fashion world view. I know that he said that he does not agree with the LGBT lifestyle, but I think he sees it as a choice. He also does not have a concept of what the green movement entails. Not to mention that he keeps convincing me that digital art is the best way to go. I want to tell him with the way the economy is, there won't be any advancement of technology, thus very little room for digital art. In order to understand all visual art, you must understand the basics. In otherwords, it does not make sense if someone can make drawings on a computer if that person does not know how to use pencil and paper.It's hard to have conversations with people who do not have a sense of self-discovery. I am lucky that he just wants to be a friend and show me the ropes of computer imaging. I guess I'm a free-spirited person and I need to be around others who are similar.

BTW, I made the conscious decision to only date men who are vegan. It has nothing to do with culture of veganism, but rather the attraction I have for a man who shares similar goals in life. Men who are vegan also look younger.

My Philosophy Test/ Other Things

Yesterday evening I took the philosophy exam. It was not my best, but now I know what to expect on my instructor's future exams. It wasn't so much that I bombed the test on whim. I believe that I got pwned by it and it's worth 18% of my grade. That means if I get an A on everyother exam and the paper and future assignments, then the highest I can get in the class is a B-.

Taking the test would not have been bad if the following things did not happen:

Procastination: I realize now that I have to go back to the old ways of studying for these classes as school is not going to get any easier as I proceed. My biggest mistake is waiting until the weekend before the exam to decide that I want to study.

Lack of help: Asking for help or getting tutoring is essential to be successful in college. I'll keep this in mind in the future.

Not studying on campus: I have too many distractions at home and the internet is one of them. I know better now. I rather cut off the bad habits now and not wait until two weeks until finals

The three things listed are things that I could control. I cannot control running into my ex and his new presumed girlfriend. That was a huge distraction. I regret dating him, and the fact that I have to share my share any space with him makes me cringe. It made me want to go back home, but I cannot afford to miss another art class, so I had to go to art class, be stressed and show up to philosophy only to bomb the test epically.

My male friend from California called during class. I got lucky because the phone was on vibrate. Later on last night I ran into an older man that helped me move in May. He's a pretty nice guy. He reminds me of my uncle and he's in his late thirties. It's hard to fully trust anyone if you live on your own without family, even when you share your life story with others. I think next time I'll be careful when I meet others.

Long Break From Studying

I am taking a long, overly destracted break from my philosophy book. The test is tomorrow, and it's almost 11pm. Earlier I made a couple of blogposts about race and religion. Because this is a gaming blog and I want more readers, I am going to take those down and stay true to the content of this site. I believe that expressing my frustrations with humanity through concrete forms of expression will make me no better than the people I am verbally lashing out against. It's not a matter of censorship, but a realization that I want my blog to be a possible avenue for gamers like myself. Unlike mainstream sites who allow free reign in the comment session, I want my blog and eventually my website to be a means to bring together a real community of gamers that welcomes everyone.

I noticed that I've been going blogging overload. Just so much to say that some things I decide to take down do not matter. I have two other blogs: Life On The Cheap and Prometheus. Prometheus will be a website dedicated to art and gaming eventually.

I think due to my semi-antisocial behavior lately, I've been making at least two blogs per day and they are like five pages long. I don't want to bore my readers to tears. I want them to be excited when they read my material online. In place of blogging so much, I'll be coming up with new art projects and studying more for each class. There are so many ideas for so many things I want to do that I can't keep up with them.

End of the Year Releases

Releases for the fourth quarter (Fall 2010-Dec 2010)

Halo Reach Sept 14

Call of Duty: Black Ops

Assassin's Creed Brotherhood Nov 16


*When I come across more new releases I'll post them accordingly.

Maintenance

I usually read my blog posts long after I post them and some of them are in need of editing and revising due to grammar, spelling and content. Although my blogs are available to the world to read, they are usually written as though no one reads them. So, incase someone somehow finds my blog and reads it, I want to make sure that it passes the grammer and spelling test.

Every Thursday or Friday, I'll designate some time in my school's computer lab to edit and revise posts. This is for both of my blogs (Ungrounded and Life On The Cheap).

Who Do They Think I Am?

Sometimes in life you don't realize something until you put two and two together pretty much a year later. You don't hang out with a group of people, but at the same time, you don't understand why, until reinforcements hit you. Well, that has happend to me. Yesterday, to be exact. I told myself I would never date a man from here. I gave simple reasons such as "the men are not cultured", or my favorite "too many of them are missing too many teeth". Yesterday was a reinforcement of why I would not date any man who has any affinity to this city or the school here. A guy approached me while I was on my way to the store. The friend lived here, but he didn't. I thought he wanted to get to know me. I was wrong, because any guy that is tatted up as him does not deserve a shot with me. I find too many tattoos to be dirty and disgusting. The same can be said about having too many piercings. He was a hot Latino guy. He looked good. I'm usually into dark hair and pale skin, but a brown guy is still hot. So this guy followed me and I told him my age he told me his. He said he was twenty. It gave me a pause. I told him I dated a guy that was 21 and he seemed mature for his age, but he showed his age. I remembered an advice column I read about women who are twenty five hooking up with guys who are 18, 19 at most 20. The columnist felt the woman was stradling an ethical line with these young men. I don't want to be labeled a cougar or a puma. I like my men to be in their mid to late 20's.

His age didn't bother me as much as what he wanted. He had the gall to ask him I wanted to do drugs with him and his friend and hook up for sex. I told him "I'm not that kind of girl". Meaning "I don't do drugs or hook up with random strangers". It was then when I realized that I should not pity the men here.I don't anymore. They don't know how to approach a women and they get mad when no woman wants to date them. The men in this country are all like that. They are afraid that they have to work harder to obtain a woman. Women work really hard all the time to impress a potential date. It would not hurt if a man stops being a douchbag for one night to impress the woman of his choice. I know of men who are nice to only women they are dating. They are very mean toward other women. I remember my ex told me about a co worker his mother worked with a while ago. He was Russian and he saw a gender war in this country between men and women. He said this man said that American women do not know how to appreciate a man. My rebuttal to that is: why should any woman appreciate a man who belittles her, insults her intelligence, calls her names and cuts her off while she's speaking? How can I or any other woman in this country appreciate a man who does not know how to treat women?

When I lived on campus in the halls, I noticed this. Men want women who had way less sex partners than them, and yet they seem to sleep with every woman that moves. They were socially akward, unfit they had eachother to hang out with and called people who were not a part of them socially akward. No woman wanted to date them. They would never say why, but thinking about it now, I understand. Partially, I can blame other women for choosing these types of men. I don't think that I would have a problem dating in a more diverse city such as New York or the heart of LA. I believe that we as a society needs to cope with the new type of woman. Most women now do not want to get married at 20 and start a family before 25. The ones I know want to to party, and then you have my sister who has a man and a child and she still likes to hang out. Some women want their cakes and eat them too. Some women want to enjoy as many men as possible and not get married. I'm one of those. I rather be married to my passions in art than to spend the rest of my life with a man who holds double-standard views. I inspire to enjoy as many men as possible and reap the carnage when I'm fifty.

I don't want to alienate any men who read my blogs. Maybe they can address these concerns. I don't think that all men are bad. I think that the ones who expect too much from women and have lower standards for themselves are the ones to watch out for. If I could do last year over again, interms of living on campus and interacting with others, I'd lie and say I'm engaged even when I'm really singled.

The Big Day

The newest and final installment of XBOX's Halo series will be on shelves tomorrow. I will be too busy to play this game, but hopefully over the winter I'll catch up with my gaming. I feel like I'm slightly growing out of videogaming in favor of something else, but I'll save that for another post.

When Life Bites Back (Artist Style)

I come from a family with a long line of artists, especially on my mom's side. I really LOVE art. I love to create, to be inspired to let my imagination go to places that I know do not exist in reality. With art, I love to make my own mark in the world. However, the gift of art also has a curse that goes along with it. It's called the "Artist Mentality". I'm sure that when you go out into the world, you meet two types of people. Type A personality and Type B. Type A is usually the personality that is more left-brained. I believe these people to be neurotic and perfectionists. These people know what they want in life. If they can finish college when they barely graduated from kindergarten to the first grade, they would. Type B personalities are different. They are stereotyped as being slackers, lazy, drifting as though they are in a small life boat in a huge sea called life. I used to be the first one in middle and highschool, but when I became an adult, it seemed as though my personality had a paradigm shift. My sense of curiosity and discovery consumes every fiber of my being. The fact that I don't make decisions and stick to them makes me what they call an "artist".

Art is one of those degrees in school that do not really have a clear path. One can have an art degree and decide to be a filmmaker, architect, or even a fine artist. These days, a college degree is like that extra money that you found in your pocket after you didn't have enough change a few days ago to tip the waitor at a restaurant. It's there, and it can take you anywhere, and you can only do so much with it. You can spend that little change on whatever. It's really hard to tell someone with an artist mentality what he/she can or can't do with his or extra change.

Some are reading this as will ask what I'm getting to. Today, I realized that I DO NOT like digital media as an artform. I detest it. Andy Warhol pushed the buttons when he calls blown up versions of life objects art. Duchamp and Oldenburg were out of their minds when they call simple objects art. The art world was once this place where the elite of society can basque into someone's imagination and pay millions to have a piece of someone. From my experience in school, it seems like the art here is more about decoration and calling anything art. So, I retire digital media completely. I'll use photoshop to scale images for my life-size paintings of media images. I would go as far as to say that I do not criticize Warhol or Duchamp. I inspire to be somewhat like Warhol, because his art does to this day hold a mirror to the face of what was pop culture in the sixties and what is now history of a turbulent era. If I kept this class, I would have been closer to finishing my art degree, but because I rather feel like I really created something that can be real, rather than abstraction, I'll continue my path in drawing(possibly painting/sculpting) and philosophy. I'll be so happy when I finish my degree. I should talk to someone about getting a liberal studies degree, instead. I hope that I grow out of this artist mentality, because everyday I'm closer to being 30.